Books That Heal: My Favorite Reads for Understanding Trauma, Connection, and Self-Compassion
As a trauma therapist, I’m often asked by clients and colleagues alike: “What should I read to better understand what I’m going through?” Whether you're navigating your own healing journey, supporting a loved one, or simply curious about the ways our minds and bodies hold—and release—pain, the right book can be incredibly validating.
The list below includes some of the most impactful titles I return to again and again, both professionally and personally. These authors explore the intersections of trauma, attachment, nervous system regulation, generational patterns, and self-worth with clarity and compassion. Each offers a different window into healing, whether through science, memoir, or practical tools.
If you’ve ever felt stuck, disconnected, or unsure of how your past is shaping your present, I hope one or more of these books meets you where you are—and gently helps you take your next step.
Here are my recommended reads:
When the Body Says No – Gabor Maté
Explores the connection between stress, emotional repression, and chronic illness, emphasizing the importance of mind-body awareness in healing.
What My Bones Know – Stephanie Foo
A deeply personal memoir that examines the long-term effects of complex PTSD and the author's journey to reclaim her life and identity.
Our Polyvagal World – Stephen Porges & Seth Porges
Introduces the Polyvagal Theory to show how our nervous system shapes our emotions, behavior, and ability to connect in a complex world.
Attached – Amir Levine & Rachel Heller
Breaks down adult romantic relationships through the lens of attachment theory to help people find and maintain healthy partnerships.
Transcending Trauma – Frank Anderson
Offers a guide to healing from complex trauma using a blend of neuroscience, Internal Family Systems therapy, and compassionate self-discovery.
What Happened to You? – Oprah Winfrey & Bruce D. Perry
Reframes trauma by shifting the question from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happened to you?”—highlighting the power of empathy and understanding in healing.
Good Morning, I Love You – Shauna Shapiro
Combines neuroscience and mindfulness practices to help cultivate self-compassion and emotional well-being.
How to Do the Work – Nicole LePera
Provides a practical roadmap for self-healing by integrating psychology, holistic health, and conscious awareness.
It Didn’t Start with You – Mark Wolynn
Explores how inherited family trauma can shape our lives and how to identify and break generational cycles of pain.
Set Boundaries, Find Peace – Nedra Glover Tawwab
Offers actionable strategies for setting healthy boundaries to improve relationships, reduce stress, and build self-respect.
Every Memory Deserves Respect – Michael Baldwin & Deborah Korn
Demystifies EMDR therapy through personal narrative and expert guidance to show how trauma can be effectively processed and resolved.
